醫院各科室的搞笑對聯<div style="text-align: center;"><font style="color: DarkOrange; font-weight: bold;" size="5"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">醫院各科室的搞笑對聯</span></font><br></div><div style="text-align: center;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;"><br>（資料來源：網路文章）</span></font><br><br><br><br><br style="font-family: Verdana;"></div><div style="text-align: center;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;"></span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">1 放射科</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">上聯：任她胸大胸小，片上只見心肺，</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">下聯：管你貌美貌醜，視下俱是骷髏。</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">橫批：穿不穿衣一個樣</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;"> </span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">2 婦產科</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">上聯：十月懷一朝產，都盼母子平安</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">下聯：一人進兩人出，且看巾幗英雄</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">橫批：果然平安</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;"> </span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">3 腎內科</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">上聯：前尿道，後尿道，有病難道</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">下聯：左腎臟，右腎臟，無尿易喪</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">橫批：關鍵是尿</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;"> </span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">4 骨科</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">上聯：非木匠，非石匠，也曾揮鋸弄錘</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">下聯：是醫生？是強盜？經常綁手縛足</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">橫批：刀斧情深</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;"> </span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">5 麻醉科</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">上聯：打一針便可手足麻木</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">下聯：吹口氣立刻人事不醒</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">橫批：不痛就行</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;"> </span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">6 泌尿科</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">上聯：兩管能通天下水</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">下聯：一刀露出命根來</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">橫批：大禹之功</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;"> </span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">7 肝膽科</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">上聯：管你英雄豪傑，來此便喪膽</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">下聯：勸那男女老少，莫要壞心肝</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">橫批：壞了沒法醫</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;"> </span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">8 胸外科</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">上聯：掏心挖肺，未必心狠手黑</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">下聯：抽氣放血，還我神清氣爽</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">橫批：胸外人管胸內事</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;"> </span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">9 五官科</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">上聯：雙眼如炬，善觀生老病死</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">下聯：兩耳順風，常聞是非恩怨</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">橫批：都要清楚</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;"> </span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">10 腦外科</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">上聯：開頭顱，抽熱血，只是頭痛便好治</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">下聯：循溝回，理神經，惟有心思最難猜</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">橫批：打開看看</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;"> </span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">11 ICU科</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">上聯：重癥搶救，盡顯英雄本色</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">下聯：特級護理，只是收費太貴</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">橫批：不貴不行</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;"> </span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">12 消化科</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">上聯：奧美甲氰，都可制酸</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">下聯：胃竇球部，好發潰瘍</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">橫批：剛好對癥</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;"> </span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">13 普外科</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">上聯：常問飲食，都是一群直腸人</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">下聯：總關冷暖，沒有半點甲狀心</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">橫批：放屁了沒有</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;"> </span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">14 兒科</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">上聯：一哭二鬧三發燒，小人難倒大人</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">下聯：七橫八豎兩層樓，加床超過正床</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">橫批：就是太忙</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;"> </span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">15 呼吸科</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">上聯：喉頭有痰，幹鳴濕鳴齊奏</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">下聯：肺上發炎，膿痰血痰皆咯</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">橫批：呼吸困難</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;"> </span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">16 傳染科</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">上聯：常恐交流惹禍</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">下聯：還是隔離放心</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">橫批：改日再聊</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;"> </span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">17 腫瘤科</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">上聯：常睹人生離合苦，英雄落淚</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">下聯：力爭世間無奈事，神醫多情</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">橫批：人定勝天</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;"> </span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">18 中醫科</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">上聯：問西歐諸國，誰懂散寒解表</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">下聯：憐東方神技，只剩補腎壯陽</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">橫批：已非時珍</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;"> </span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">19 心內科</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">上聯：處事者，心有七竅方玲瓏</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">下聯：為人也，胸無二念才坦然</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">橫批：心病有藥無藥</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;"> </span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">20 血液科</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">上聯：貧血便輸，輸一紅二白三小板，原來全系降低</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">下聯：發熱就查，查七血八尿九骨髓，結果是個感冒</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">橫批：開個玩笑</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;"> </span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">21 內分泌科</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">上聯：尿裡含糖，不是浪費是糖尿</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">下聯：眼中有神，不是漂亮是甲亢</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">橫批：就這倆病</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;"> </span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">22神經內科</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">上聯：瘋瘋癲癲癡癡傻傻腦殼有包</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">下聯：渾渾噩噩癱癱軟軟顱內出血</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">橫批：難得糊塗</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;"> </span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">給自己一副對聯:</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">上聯:蕭蕭灑灑快快樂樂不問天下事</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">下聯:漂漂靚靚風風流流世間走一回</span></font><br style="font-family: Verdana;"><font style="color: rgb(68, 85, 166);" size="4"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">橫批:享受人生</span></font></div>